In the depths of my mind, depression speaks a language of its own. Every day, it weaves its way through my thoughts, distorting my perception of self and the world around me. In this post, I use each letter ( D-E-P-R-E-S-S-I-O-N) to represent this internal dialogue. Yet, I can’t fully articulate the chaos that rages within me.
D – Darkness Descends
“Do you feel the shadows creeping in?
It’s like a weight settling on your shoulders, isn’t it? You try to push it away, but it just clings tighter. Every morning feels clouded, and every night turns into a restless battle. Doubt and dread are constant companions now; happiness is just an illusion. You might as well accept the darkness — it’s here to stay.”
E – Exhaustion Engulfs
“Remember when you used to feel alive?
Now, every movement feels like climbing a mountain. I drain your energy until there’s nothing left. You’re not just tired from today; you’re exhausted from fighting me. Why even bother? Rest won’t help you. I’ll make sure you stay in this state of endless fatigue.”
P – Pain Prevails
“Can you sense that ache in your chest?
It’s like I’m pressing down on your heart. Every breath’s a struggle. This pain follows you everywhere, reminding you of your brokenness. Nothing can save you.”
R – Rumination Replays
“Remember those old mistakes?
I’ll echo them in your mind over and over again. You can try to distract yourself, but I’ll keep reminding you. No matter what, I’ll be there, anchoring you to regret. You can’t escape me, so why even try?”
E – Emptiness Echoes
“Do you feel that void inside?
It’s like a hollow ache, gnawing at your spirit. The silence is deafening, isn’t it? I make everything feel meaningless, stripping the color from your world. You search for something to fill this gap, but nothing can penetrate this emptiness.”
S – Sorrow Surges
“Can you sense the tears welling up?
I’m the silent storm that brews within you, ready to spill over at any moment. Just when you think you’re okay, the waves of sorrow will pull you back under.”
S – Stagnation Stays
“Why move when you can just stay put?
I keep you locked in place, convincing you that effort is pointless. You look around, watching the world move on without you, and wonder why you should even try. The fear of the unknown is my favorite tool; it keeps you right where I want you. Just stay still; it’s easier that way.”
I – Isolation Intensifies
“Isn’t it obvious?
You’re all alone. I create walls around you, trapping you in an invisible prison. No one sees you. You merely exist, moving through life like a ghost.”
O – Overwhelm Occludes
“Can you see how everything has turned into a blur?
Even the simplest tasks seem impossible now, don’t they? I’m here to make sure you feel buried under the weight of everything and nothing. That heaviness? It’s mine. You’ll feel like you’re drowning in a fog, struggling to find clarity. Just give up.”
N – Numbness Negates
“Do you sense that dullness swallowing you?
It’s like you’re watching your own life from a distance. Joy? Sadness? Everything just fades into nothing. This numbness is my gift to you; it protects you from feeling too deeply.”
Hope Whispers
Depression’s voices are loud, sometimes deafening. But they aren’t all there is. While each letter captures a part of depression, it doesn’t tell the full story. There’s another letter, H, for Hope — a voice that may seem faint but is always present, waiting to be heard.
